7 Years!

On our wedding day

Us now!

7 years ago today I was waking up the morning after my wedding. 7 years ago today was my first full day as a wife, after spending the first night in the bedroom of my new house, with my new husband. Our wedding was a fairytale, but more important than the dress, the cake, or the venue was that it was celebrated with our closest family and friends, and I became his wife that day.

Last night we celebrated 7 years of marriage. My mom came over to look after the littles, and we went out for dinner at the Melting Pot - oh my goodness, SO good! The food was fantastic, the atmosphere was lovely, but most of all it was nice to sit down with my love and have it be just us. The coolest part of the restaurant is that the 2-person booths are secluded from the rest of the restaurant, and it feels like you're in your own little private room :) Hubs and I talked and laughed and for 3 hours it was just the 2 of us.

One highlight of the evening was the sparkler Hubby gave me that he picked up while in Dubai as an anniversary gift:

Diamonds and sapphires! He done good ;)

I can't believe it's been 7 years! I am so thankful for my husband, and for my family. In 7 years we've welcomed 2 beautiful children, we've traveled the world (especially him), we've both grown in our careers, and we've moved into our dream home. I am so proud to be his wife. I am so proud of all he's done, and all we've done together. I look at him at see the man of my dreams, and each and every day he becomes more so. I am so proud of my family, and the life that Hubby and I have made for ourselves. We've had our ups, and our downs, but each challenge we've faced has only made us stronger. Marriage isn't always easy, but it's what you do when you're in the downs that makes the biggest difference. Every day I wake up choosing to love him. Every day I wake up choosing to be a family with him. I love him so wholly and completely, and I can't imagine my life without him, and I am so very glad that he is mine, and that I am his. And as cliche as it sounds, I really do love him more today than I did 7 years ago, standing in front of our family and friends and God and pledging to love him for all my days.

Thank you for letting me be your wife, husband-of-mine, and letting me love you!

I Gotta Be Me, and You Can Be Me too.

Since when did getting pregnant mean I was no longer able to make good decisions for myself?

It seems like forever ago when I wrote this post. It also seems like forever ago since I wrote this post. (It also seems like forever ago since I tagged my posts, which I need to start doing again. But that's beside the point...)

Yesterday a bunch of moms came under attack. Yesterday a mom came personally under attack both publicly and privately. Yesterday a bunch of moms felt attacked. Yesterday a bunch of moms attacked... each other. It's not the first time I've witnessed it or been a part of it, either. This time it was over SAHMs, WAHMs, and WOHMs (Stay-at-home moms, work-at-home moms, and work-out-of-the-home moms), who had it harder, who did what by who's choice, and who had what right to complain about it. I would reference the blog posts in question, but one post has since been removed by the author, and the other post's comment section turned into a gigantic sh*tball of inflammatory comments. Anderson did a recent show on the topic, Dr. Phil did one awhile back, and depending on what studies you read, working outside the home will kill your children, but staying at home will kill you (maybe a slight exaggeration, but I got sick of reading abstracts after about an hour). And proclaiming to be part of either group will open you up to a world of criticism on your parenting, your marriage, and your worth as a woman, a mother, and a human being.

As for where I stand, I am all 3, and yet none of the above by any of the group's standards (and have been told so before by "members" of each group). I am a SAHM in the sense that I am with my kids 90% of the time. My career path was chosen because I wanted to stay at home, and career opportunities were passed on as well. But some wouldn't consider me a SAHM because I bring in an income, and occasionally work outside the home ("occasionally" being a max of 30 hours a month). I am a WAHM in the sense that I take away time from playing with the kids or doing housework on occasion to sit in the kitchen to do research, edit power points, type up brochures/lesson plans/etc for a business that I own, but I am not a WAHM because at this point I am still in the start-up phase for some aspects of my ventures, and am not full-time. I am a WOHM in the sense that occasionally I work in-hospital, and have to balance childcare, my schedule, and the schedule of my employer, and I spend sometimes 10+ hours away from my children, but I am not a WOHM because I dictate a large part of my schedule, including deciding when I do and do not want to come in, and am out of the house an average 7 hours a week, versus the standard 40+ hours a week that is considered fulltime. What part of my life do I think is easiest? Depends on the day. It depends on the work I'm doing, the mood the kids are in, and whether or not I'm solo-parenting.

There's a whole world of guilt associated with motherhood already. We are constantly questioned on our choices and actions. If you don't breastfeed you've failed. If you co-sleep you're going to kill your child. If you babywear you're going to spoil your baby. If you set your baby down you're never going to bond with them. It's kind of ridiculous. We have enough going on without arguing with each other. You'd think that the people most sensitive to the judgment, stigmas, and doubt would be fellow moms.

Apparently I was wrong. I can shrug off random people telling me what is or isn't good for my kid when they're childless. It's cliche, but you have no idea what it's like, and I know your opinions might change once you're in my position. I am shocked, however, at the lack of compassion I've witnessed recently online. You yourselves are mothers. Even if you don't understand, can't you empathize? I'm a breastfeeding advocate. It's part of my job. I get paid for it, and my reputation depends on it. And the best I can hope for is that you make whatever decision you want to make with the correct information, which I can provide you. After that, whether or not you chose to breastfeed is actually none of my business, and I will support you either way because I can imagine that you aren't just randomly making decisions. You're basing it on the needs and well-being of you and your family. That goes beyond to the rest of parenting as well. I don't know why you're returning to work after 6 weeks, why your baby sleeps in his own room, why you're using cloth diapers, or why you're not buying a stroller, but I'm sure you've got your reasons. I just hope that you've educated yourself and are making decisions with current, correct information in-hand.

These so-called Mommy wars are nothing new, and I know I'm not the only one who feels this way. But this is ridiculous.

The Trade-Off.

Hubby has traveled far and wide. His latest trip brings him to Dubai.

Hubs is gone again. This time Dubai. This trip is certainly shorter than some have been (longest he's been gone is 2 weeks, thankfully), and the time change is actually perfect for the long nights (Tobes doesn't sleep for me. He will for Hubs... Or my mom... But that is a different rant). 11-hour difference means that I can text him at midnight, and it's 11am for him. But he is gone, and I miss him. I miss the random lunch hour calls. I miss him walking in the door at 5:35 and the shrieks from the kids as they run into his arms. I miss my partner-in-crime, especially at bedtime - he takes care of Tobes, I take care of Princess, and it's done! I miss hanging out with him on the couch after the littles are in bed as we talk about our days, plan for the weekend, or just joke around. I miss the hugs, the kisses, and the snuggles in bed (especially as we hit a cold-snap! He's my personal furnace!)

Princess and Tobes miss him. Tobes doesn't sleep for me, which means that not only is he missing his Daddy, but the nights are sleepless for him. Princess is a Daddy's girl through and through, and so it hits her hard, though she's gotten used to dropping him off at the airport, and skyping with him as time/internet accessibility permits. It's gotten easier as time has gone by, which is good, but it's also sad. I didn't think I'd be at the point where I'd be getting used to saying goodbye, sometimes every month (like in the stretch we are now), and sometimes with as little as 2 days notice. He isn't gone that often, especially compared to other families I know, but we also aren't set up for him to be gone for any length of time either. We didn't foresee this when we got married, almost 7 years ago. We thought it'd be a trip to the states now and then, but he's also seen China, India, Singapore, and now the UAE. Not to mention Scotland, England, and Ireland (which we scrimped and saved and Princess and I were able to tag along to Ireland!!)

But it's the trade-off. Hubs is smart, loyal, dedicated, and an incredibly hard worker who was fast-tracked into his current position which is taking him around the world. He is in a high position for his age, and he's got nowhere to go but up. He works for a company that has bent over backwards in the past as we've faced health concerns, and family emergencies. He has job security, and the other benefits mean that we can tag along on a trip of a lifetime to Ireland, Princess can take Irish dance, I can pursue my own dreams and goals regardless of the cost (both in time and money), and we can still plan our other trips for the family (we've got a Disneyland vacation in the works for next winter!) I am damn proud of him, and all he's accomplished in the almost 9 years we've been together. He's a brilliant man, and his brilliance has given him the opportunities we all get to experience. I'm not bragging, but I count my blessings and remember that this is the trade-off. And it is all worth it in the end.

But in the meantime, I miss my husband.

Shake It Out

I love this video. I've been through some major changes in the last 2 years, and I am living a life I only dreamed of, but at the end of the day, we all carry things with us from our past, and this is the year I am finally going to "shake it out". It means making some changes to how I spend my time, and where I spend my energy, but dammit, I deserve it, and so does my family.

So listen to the song, and be happy :)

I Watch REALLY Bad TV...

I eluded to it in a previous post, but part of my new year's resolution is to stop watching bad reality TV.

I'm addicted. To horrible television. Seriously. I don't watch it in front of the littles, but I'll have it on in the background while I'm working at the computer, after they've gone to bed, or before they wake up. I have stopped watching Toddlers and Tiaras (I have, honestly), but TLC's other goodies like "Geek Love" and "Virgin Diaries" are tempting. But my biggest weakness is for "The Real Housewives" and all it's franchises. It's voyeuristic to see how "the other side" lives, and a guilty pleasure. It's amazing to see all their fancy clothes, the amazing houses (that's what really gets me!), the cars, the jewelery, and the trips. There is plastic surgery and botox galore, especially in the OC and Beverly Hills shows, and everyone is addicted to work, business deals, and starting new business ventures (which seems to happen especially in the second seasons, as fame grows I assume). Lavish parties are thrown, and it's all about who you know. It's amazing how many people have "dear friends" in the entertainment industry, in the hottest restaurants, or in the hotel business. In a sick way, it's also almost reassuring to watch how more money seems to lead to more problems - the bankruptcies, the short-sells, the tabloids, and the drama. You watch the strong personalities clash as you figure out the different cliques, think of who is in the wrong, and pick sides in every situation. I get caught up in the drama and the catfights and deceit and betrayal, and sadly I could even relate some of the situations, though thankfully I haven't had my hair pulled since my brother was a toddler...

It's just a waste of energy, and time, and I don't need it! So I'm starting with cutting out The Real Housewives of New Jersey (the cattiest of all, I think), and will go from there :) It's also baby steps into going more TV-free. I doubt I'll ever actually stop watching TV, I love it too much, but between Project Domestication, the littles getting bigger and playtime with them changing, and even just having a different house with a bigger backyard, a crafting room, etc, when I do watch TV, it's time to choose better shows! I went through a period where I needed to rid my real-life of all the drama, why shouldn't I rid my TV-life as well? ;)

So here's to a TV-free-er 2012!!

Wordless Wendnesday

Project Domestication

I'm not looking to become a Stepford Wife, but I need a little work...

So you may or may not notice a new tab at the top of my blog! I've launched a new blog, "Project Domestication". Remember how I was talking about new house resolutions, well this is where I'm hoping to track them and my progress. I'll still post in here, don't worry - I want to keep the other blog solely for my new house resolution. At this moment, I can't figure out how to get the tab to work (it's supposed to be linked to my new blog), but in the meantime, feel free to click on the link in this post, and have a look-see! Please post comments, or helpful tips if you have any! Or simply cheer me on as I continue on my quest for domestication!

2012!

Happy New Year!!

So I might be a few days late, and I apologize ;) But I hope everyone has had a safe and wonderful holiday season. I've been thinking of resolutions for awhile... I started with making some resolutions for our new home, and then I started to think about who I was in 2011, and who I want to be in 2012.

2011 was apparently a year of change for a LOT of people. Everyone I have talked to faced major things last year, good or bad. For myself, 2011 was full of challenges. I started a business, and I met some amazing women. We moved out of our first home, and moved into our "forever" home. New friendships and relationships were forged, others changed, and some even came to a close. Special babies were born in 2011, and special babies were created to appear in 2012. I learned new things about me, good and bad. 2011 was by no means awful, but I must admit I am more than happy that it's come to an end.

I have 2 different posts sitting in my queue, all half-finished. One is about my new-home resolutions, and one is about all the awful TV I watch. Both come into play when I talk about what I want 2012 to be for me and my family. I want 2012 to be a year of peace, and I want the theme to be 100% completely family-focused. Obviously my children and my husband are always in the forefront, but I want to maintain that always whether it be in business-dealings, relationships, friendships, or just how I spend my time. I want to be less busy this year. I lead a VERY active social like, and I love all my friends, but I also think everyone needs some downtime now and again, and that includes me in a very big way, especially as work starts to get busier. I need to find a way to balance everyone I love so much, along with my family, my work, and my me time.

I also have MANY house-related resolutions, especially as the holidays come to a close - I am on load 4 of at LEAST 6 loads of laundry that NEED to be completed today. I need to revamp my chores list as we've now added an extra sitting room, craft room, and bathroom. Not to mention a higher-maintenance yard and just more square footage all-around. I will say that the extra square footage has FINALLY given us all the space we need for our stuff, and that's a huge relief! I also have general domestic goals (like cooking) which will also help with my goals for health. I know you've heard this from me before, but I PROMISE there will be more on this later ;)

2011 was so big, I am so excited to see what this year has in store!